Ich gehe ins Disneyland!

Bowing to the children's eagerness, we decided to spend our first day in France at Disneyland.  Ella, in particular, has been looking forward to this trip since Christmas, when my dad surprised us with a gift of park tickets.  And, sometimes, when she was fed up with school and her difficulties there, looking forward to this trip was the only thing keeping Ella going.

We left for the park at 9:00, a full hour before they opened at 10:00, because it seemed if we had to wait, we might as well wait at the park.  And, as an added bonus, we were in the fifth row in the parking lot.  Not quite up to Grizwalds' standards, but we're doing our best.

You will have fun
in Disneyland!

Outside the entrance to the park, though, was lovely.

But despite our early start, the entrance to the park was jammed: we waited for security, and then for ticket checks, as Ella and Alex grew increasingly nervous. They were sure we were going to miss...well, something. Or maybe everything. Just...just hurry, okay? The Disney frenzy was beginning to mist their eyes.

We were confused as they let us into the park, wondering if they decided to open the park early.  But the entrances to the rides sections were all cordoned off: everyone was just there, early, bunching up at the entrances, for the inevitable 10:00 mad dash. So we stood by the castle, but away from the scrum, waiting for stampede to start and planning our own attack.

A few days before we left for our trip, the kids and I had spent some time plotting on the computer, and I let them each choose the three rides they wanted most to go on. Ella chose the Alice's Curious Labyrinth and the Pocahontas Indian Village because they were unique to Disneyland Paris, and the Peter Pan's Flight, which has always been her favorite. Alex's preferences tended to fluctuate, but he seemed to have settled on the Big Thunder Mountain roller coaster, Phantom Manor (Disney's version of the Haunted Mansion), and Crush's Coaster, which is found next door to Disneyland in the Walt Disney Studios Park.  He's  a bit of a thrill seeker.

Ella's choices were close by, so we agreed to do those first. The Peter Pan ride, which in Orlando is known for its long lines, often an hour at their shortest, had a Fastpass ticket available, with a entrance time only forty-five minutes out.  So, while we waited for our Fastpass ticket to mature, Dennis and the kids jumped on the Teacup ride, and then we ran amok for a while in Alice's Labyrinth, which really was quite fun.  I was surprised to find that it was a true maze, large, with many wrong turns and dead ends, and, of course with lots of whimsy: little play areas and water squirting and statues popping out of shrubs and, in the center, the Queen of Heart's castle to explore.

After our journey with Peter Pan (picking up a second fast pass on the way out, with our second flight to Neverland scheduled for early afternoon), we had our lunch in a completely deserted restaurant, since we were eating at the highly unfashionable hour of 11:30, with surprisingly good food.  So we were off to a good start.

But after lunch, everything started to crumble, when, on our way to Frontierland for Alex's rides, Dennis and I were seduced by a mere twenty-five minute wait for the Pirates of the Caribbean ride.

Ella, back in 2006, sorting her wealth after the Pirate's ride

A friend of ours (hi, Ian!) emailed us and recommended a visit to the Paris catacombs.  It sounds like so much fun, but, after seeing Ella's reaction to the Pirate ride, I'm afraid it isn't meant to be for this trip.

We've had many trips to Orlando to visit with my family, and still more trips to Anaheim, so Ella has gone on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride several times, with varying levels of enthusiasm.  Usually she's nervous, one time she was terrified, and sometimes she really enjoys it, but she always tolerates it because, at the end, she knows there's a great gift shop filled with pirate paraphernalia, including a giant chest of plastic jewels and other fabulous treasures.  We always let the kids pick one--just one--souvenir from Disneyland, and, as long as I can remember, Ella has always chosen pirate treasure.

Waiting in line.  If this picture doesn't capture the Disney
experience, I don't know what does.

But Ella is aware that things are slightly different at Disneyland Paris, and she wasn't quite sure she trusted French pirates.  "You can't be sure, Mom," she challenged me, "there could be anything in there. They could a huge roller coaster. They could dump buckets of water on your head! They could have real pirates and they could kidnap me!"  And then an even more alarming thought crossed her mind.  "How do you know they have treasure in the gift shop?!"

But the boys, at this point, were really excited about the ride: both were practicing their pirate scowls, and Joey had gotten really good at saying "Arrrrr!" on cue, so we convinced our eight-year-old to be brave, to trust that it couldn't possibly be that bad, and to believe that they would surely have something resembling booty in the gift shop in the end. But, as we got closer to the start of the ride, and the lighting got darker and the cobwebs thicker and the skeletons more frequently, Ella was seriously regretting giving in.

Same as it ever was

Yar!

For those of you who know from Disneyland, the ride was exactly the same as the old Pirates ride used to be, before they added Johnny Depp to the scenery.  (Which surprised me, because I thought they adored Johnny in France.)  Except the pirates spoke French, although they still sang in English. Ella winced and whimpered next to Dennis the whole ride, while my shipmates were a little more enthusiastic, both boys gesturing and growling right back at the pirates.

When we exited the ride, directly into the gift shop (in finest Disney tradition), I heard a small howl of rage.  NO JEWELS! Not even doubloons!  This was a serious problem.  Our fragile girl dissolved into tears.

Most of Adventureland is devoted to pirates, with a large cove spotted with playgrounds and little caves to explore.  A walk through here cheered Ella a little, although the playgrounds were a little too safe for her tastes, now, having become accustomed to the Swiss standard.

















And she had mostly gotten control of herself as we walked through the Swiss Family Treehouse, which it seemed highly appropriate for us to visit.

Our second Fastpass to Peter Pan had just matured, and as we were heading back to Fantasyland, through a bottleneck, Ella, who was dazed with disappointment, wasn't paying attention and drifted off to look at something.

We lost her.

And ran around, for ten terrifying minutes, searching.  It didn't help matters that, as we were trying to find her, Alex was whining, desperately begging, for us to buy him a spyglass from a little gift kiosk as his one souvenir.  He wanted it, needed it, NOW. Finally, I decided to head over to the lost children room, while Dennis planned to get Alex his toy and then bring the boys to join me.

Sister off the starboard bow!

But there, just around the corner in Fantasyland, was Ella, standing as high as she could, away from the crowd (clever girl) looking desperately for us.  My worry turning to fury. I scolded her, and then took her to Dennis to be scolded some more.  "Ella, how can you be so worried about being kidnapped  by animatronic pirates, and then blithely wander off into a crowd.  Ella? Ella! What were you thinking!" Disney brings out the best in parents.

But everyone's mood softened as Dennis explained that Alex was so eager to buy a telescope as his souvenir because he was worried about Ella and he was sure it would help him find her.

We hugged it out, but we still clipped Ella's wings and made her hold onto either the stroller or one of our hands for the rest of the day.

Overwrought, we all needed a break. We thought maybe the playground at Pocahontas's village would be a good place to rest and regather ourselves.  No one was feeling especially magical. Not even Alex, who bumped into Aladdin on the way there and wasn't particularly happy about it.

Make him go away! He's too jaunty!

Looking for Plan B

I thought, as we were planning our trip, that Disneyland would ruin all other parks for my kids, but it turns out that just the opposite was true.  Ella was so looking forward to the Pocahontas area and was certain it would be her favorite part of the park, but with one quick glance the heavy truth settled on my daughter. She was getting too old for this.  Climbing structures barely taller than her head. A few plastic tunnels, made to look like tree trunks.  A teeter-totter canoe that barely wobbled.  Do you call this a playground?

Every trip to Disney before this one, these little playgrounds were always Ella's favorite part of the day.  No more.  The boys loved them, still, though, and played happily; Ella took a half-hearted turn on the slide, and then settled down with Dennis, looking for other options, blinking back tears.

Getting lost. Visiting pirates. A disappointing playground.  Disney wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

So the day wasn't going superbly, and, after yesterday's long trip and a very late (10:00) bedtime last night, it probably wouldn't get much better. So we decided to give in and go swimming. But we would try another day: we still hadn't gone a single one of the rides patient Alex had chosen.

Dennis and I, at the entrance, had noticed that a limited season pass (with about 90 black-out days) was less than a three-day ticket to Disneyland.  We'd turned this over in our heads during the day, and eventually we decided to go to the Annual Pass office to see when those blackout days were and to find out whether we could put the cost of today's tickets toward a season pass.

At the office, blissfully air conditioned, with Beauty and the Beast playing in a cozy corner, we found that every day but tomorrow would be free to us with the limited season pass and that there were many weekends and holidays that would also be available.  And, yes, we could use today's ticket toward the cost of the pass.  So, ludicrously optimistic that a good time could be had at Disneyland despite our experience so far, we handed over our credit card.

And, simultaneously, surrendered the bulk of the rest of our time in France.  Now that we have a season pass, does it make sense to do much else besides Disneyland?  They got us.

The Passport Office is in Discoveryland, a steampunk version of Tomorrowland.

We really wanted to end the day on a good note, and if there's one thing motherhood has taught me, it's that ice cream can cure anything.  After popsicles for the smaller ones and something resembling coffee for us (the purchase of popsicles gave us a coupon for free coffee: unexpected mercy!), we regained our balance.  We even looked around the gift shops a little before leaving, and Ella noticed that the glass blower in one of Main Street shops had made some tiny glass fruit that was cunning and jewel-like.

Ahoy! Treasure!

The backstory for King Ludwig's castle

Since Alex had used his one souvenir for selfless purposes, we all decided to bend the rules a little, and got a little glass basket and a package of those tiny glass fruit for Alex and Ella, each.  Of course, Alex dropped and shattered his basket within five minutes of purchase, but Ella offered hers as a replacement. She was happy with just the fruits, she told him. Don't cry.

We had our dinner in Disney Village, a mecca of American-style food (at Disney-style prices), in a restaurant called King Ludwig's Castle, which met all of our requirements for family dining: it had buttered noodles on the menu and, for Dennis and me, very, very, very-very large and well-earned beers.

And then we retreated, home for a swim. And that really put a smile back on every face.